when they are away from home a mix of feelings pervade my mind and my body. Any departure depending on destination is accompaganata by different emotions. If I think of Bologna in my mind automatically sprout words such as: "Get up - soon - the train - people - too - voices - too - late - Racing-concepts - new .."
But when I'm about to leave home to go to the gym: "toil - perspiration - vent - shower - satisfaction .."
and so on ..
but leave home to go to Bologna or at the gym certainly is not the same since.
Far from it.
To be honest I have yet to discover what it means. For now I just try to limit myself to rethink and revisit the feelings that I have crossed before-during-after my first and last real quick start.
Expected departure for months, afraid of having to wait too long, fear of not knowing to wait, afraid of having too much desire for him slowly, here comes the countdown. Questions. How will
London?
as London is in the eyes of a girl of 22 years who has gone abroad only for school trips?
as London is in the eyes of a girl who has always wanted to leave but he has always had too much unnecessary fear?
will be as beautiful as they say London?
as it will take a plane alone?
how it will deal with all these feelings alone?
.. and how he will review after 2 months?
be changed?
trascorremo as the 9 days together after many days of lontanza?
will have an English accent;)? Here
applications which finally turn into answers.
I discover how it feels to be alone in an aircraft (for many it will not be nulla.Per me so much). Adrenaline. Fear. Freedom. Nonpiùtimore. Problem: ears plugged and pain.
shyly as I discover London. Strong impact. I see great
. Multicultural. Varia. Cupa. Ventosa. Frantic. Unexpected. Bella. I remember him
Instinct leads me only to Him Walk
Abbraccio.Forte.Era rushed towards him as I hoped.
seems silly but I do not think I enjoyed the first few days in London because of my ear, and poor self-control. When a part of me does not work optimally automatically I can not behave optimally. I think and what they want to recall that it go as soon as possible. more I think more remains. Like every thing else. nervous. Desire to explore. Want to be with him afraid to take the subway alone. Strength and Courage. Lost. Try again. Succeed. Discovering that it was not so difficult. Admitting that he was right Him Like so many other times of the rest. Why are so stubborn at times?
desire to give all of myself but feel helpless at times, falling short of everything. But then at what? this is my problem: having to power at any cost to behave in a perfect way to live up to every situation. But basically it is a holiday gosh!
phasing my fears and my thoughts too, I try to live it (the city) and to live it (him).
I find the subway crowded, polluted air, people of all kinds. I find the streets of London, monuments, Camden, market, kids 'alternative', Tower Bridge, London Bridge, museums, the Tower, Buckingham Palace, a few park, Piccadilly Circus, Portobello Road, Harrods, ...
watch, observe, discover, learn. I see myself so small in that place so great. And so small in front of him that addressed all of this alone.
desire to learn, to discover. Tiredness, aching feet in the evening.
delicious dinner made by him, not always appreciated by me.
Maybe a little 'too many complaints.
Maybe too much introversion.
Maybe too many thoughts.
Maybe too much like everything to be perfect. All returns and the speech is identical to the one they are playing ("The more I think more remains. Like every thing else. ).
The days pass quickly and we try to make the most filling.
should be even better. And of course, is already di partire. Felice di aver visto tanto anche se non abbastanza. Felice di aver rivisto Lui. Felice di esser stata lontana per una settimana. Felice di aver affrontato piccole ma grandi paure.
Dispiacere prima di partire. Non credo di esser egoista. Però potevo esser più chiara.
Lui mi accompagna. Felice.
Riprendo l'aereo. Già nostalgica di quel "mondo" nel quale ho vissuto per una breve ma piena settimana.
in 2 ore sono a casa.
Com'è possibile che solo 2 ore separino due mondi così diversi?
com'è possibile che in soli 9 giorni si possan scoprire e vivere così tante cose ed emozioni?
Com'è possibile che per una semplice vacanza o viaggio il mio cervello lavori così tanto?
Perhaps it is when you leave the certainties, he leaves his base, its strong points .. you start to really know yourself. And this sometimes scares. But
be addressed.
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